There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Randomize