I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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