I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize