You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
