But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
