Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
