Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
