i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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