Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
