i think i have herpe
just one?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
