i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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