my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
