everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
