He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
