I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize