if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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