What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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