Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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