the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize