she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
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