Don't you send me to vm
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
