Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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