summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
As shirtless as possible
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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