I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
