Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
