im having a threesome with these popsicles
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
