there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
