He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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