yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
is this the sara with the beer cane?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
