Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
