I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
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