I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
