Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
