...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
