nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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