from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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