My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
