I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
