Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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