'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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