i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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