If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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