And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize