Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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