gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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