She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize