This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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