So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
