Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
