That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
my poor anus
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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