My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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