woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
